Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Christmas Letter 2006--Who keeps stealing my days??


Greetings to all.  I am convinced that the years are getting shorter…..like some magical mystical force is sneaking into my year and removing a few days here and there.  This has been going on for years and I am fairly certain that the older I get, the more days are being stolen from me.  I am pretty sure that instead of the typical 365 days this year that I enjoyed somewhere in the neighbor hood of 200.  Does this happen to any of you or is it just me?  Maybe it’s because I will be 40 in six months or maybe it’s because we seem to be driven toward taking on large remodeling projects just as we are about to have a house full of holiday guests or perhaps its because I am continually playing “beat the clock” and running late from a meeting with a student to a cub scout gathering to the airport and if I am lucky with just enough time to hit the gas station.

At any rate, I am late this year with almost everything because some of my days have gone missing.  For example, my house has the Christmas tree up with lights on but no ornaments.  The ornaments have been dug out from their prison underneath the stairs, but I need an extra day to get them onto the tree.  Does anyone have a day on reserve day I can borrow?  If someone does not lend me a day soon I will have no Christmas cookies made and will be lucky to get the shopping for Christmas groceries completed.  Do you suppose the family would mind eating take-out Chinese on Christmas?  I am pretty sure Ponderosa will be open for a few hours on Christmas…. we could go there.  Christmas grand buffet anyone?
As my years get shorter I have noticed some other odd things happening to me.  I began calling the college students the “kids” this year.  I have no idea why. It just sort of snuck into my vocabulary.  I also hurt in places I didn’t know I had….especially after throwing Adam into the air.  More and more things are being covered on my health insurance because of my age and I see real value in not only purchasing but using Oil of Olay eye cream.  Bizarre.

Because I have lost so many days and neither my kids nor James seem to have them hidden anywhere, (or do they?) I have asked for their help in writing this year’s letter to save myself time.  When asked what they did with their days this year they said: 

James:  I did not work as much last summer as usual.  I spent lots of time in the pool with Alex and his friend Casey.  I built a deer “condo” in the woods complete with vinyl windows, storm door, carpeting, insulation and metal roof.  (and the beauty is that Melissa thinks I am out working---don’t tell her!)  I got a nice deer and taught my students how to carve duck decoys out of cork.  I made my annual pilgrimage to the Holy Land (the Bass Pro Shop in Springfield) and bought my first NEW compound bow.  I worship it weekly.  I took 24 students fishing (Melissa thinks I am out of my mind) and my neighbor gave me a percussion cap rifle model 1841 from the pre-civil war era.  (That last sentence is why Melissa does not let me write the Christmas letter…….)  I am particularly proud of my days spent teaching last year as our students achieved a rank among the top 10 students in English in the state according to test scores, proving to Alex once again that spelling words and grammar are indeed valued and important in our society if not so much in Northeast Missouri.

Alex:  I had a cool birthday party with an “under the sea” theme and all my friends came.  I jumped off of the top of a pontoon boat and successfully completing a cannon ball with an accidental twist (my mom closed her eyes the first 15 times)  My mom and dad were so engrossed in the rest of the family during the big group family picture at papa Jim’s 60th birthday party at the lake that they forgot I was in the cabin playing my video game.  I am not in the picture but I forgave them after they cried for two hours and begged me to. (I am a VERY forgiving child and took pity on the poor fools)  I study my spelling words very hard even though they are “optional.”  Mom and dad say that when you are the kid of a teacher that extra school work is never “optional.”  Sometimes I wish I were the kid of a rock star or a video game developer.  I still love my blue blanket but no one is supposed to know that so don’t tell.  I don’t let mom or dad kiss me at school and that drives them nuts.  I played soccer and love “hands on science” and cub scouts!  I tried to be nice to my brother even though he is ALWAYS  in the way and often bites me.  Sometimes, I am nice and let him in my room…….sometimes.   I love the kid though…..it’s nice to have a groupie who will fend off attacking strangers with his teeth.

Adam:  (Okay, he’s two so Melissa will paraphrase)
I stayed home while Alex went to cub scouts.  I stayed home while Alex went to soccer practice.  I went to the babysitters when Alex stayed home for a snow day.  (recognize a theme here?  Yea…me too….really ticks me off…..maybe I should bite someone) I tried to play Alex’s video game and he yelled at me for messing it up. I tried to read Alex’s big-boy books but unless they had a car or truck or ambulance in them they were too boring.  I ate all my peas. My great aunt Polly taught me to say “no way” and I say it all the time. I like to say “no nap” and “no new diaper.” Mom and dad tell me I will like the potty but so far I’m not convinced.  I want to be Alex when I grow up but I love to say “me Adam Hendler.”  I’m obsessed with milk and my blue blanket and I try not to bite and hit but sometimes I forget.  My mom thinks I’m a-dor-a-ble but I say “no way dor-able!”

So that’s where the year went for our family.  I just checked the date and it’s been 3 days since I started writing this letter………..does anyone have any spare days to donate?  I know an overwhelmed yet worthy cause……….

Happy Holidays from our house to yours.

Peace,

Melissa and the boys


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